I must admit to having moments, days, whole sections of my life when I have felt insecure. Worrying what people are thinking about how I spend my days at home with the children. I remember thinking that as soon as I get this book published then I'll be someone, everyone will see just how busy I've been working and that I'm important. I judged myself based on what others were doing and felt less than while my friends climbed the corporate ladder, got masters and doctorate degrees while I typed away on a dream that seemed to forever be deferred. Having to defend myself as a writer with no income or product to show for it was draining and often sent me crawling around in the dark. I thought that I would be good enough once I've became published, made more money (okay, any kind of money), was able to buy Honey his dream house and then I'd live happily ever after. After listening to A Return to Love by Marianne Williamson (at least three times), I've been stunned with the realization that I've been waiting for the world to validate my worthiness. The only person who has held me back from feeling good enough, smart, talented, successful is me. I know this must sound crazy as my message and goal is to be a motivating Light, but to teach you have to learn and it's soulfully cleansing to finally get it.
It is so easy to get caught up in thinking that success and happiness comes after you achieve that long laundry list that we have constructed in our heads, and only after will we be content. It's a lie. The list never goes away and if we don't stop, pause and realized our own perfection right now then we become like hamsters on a running wheel. We are all perfect now, not after...or once...now.
Marianne Williamson has become famous for, "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.' We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we're liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
This thought makes me feel glorious inside. So let this be our mantra for the week. "I am perfect now. I have achieved greatness already and tomorrow will be even better, but right now in this present moment my life is perfect. Right now. I will not wait until the laundry list is accomplished to feel powerful beyond measure. I'm claiming my power, my greatness, my success right now and it feels great!"
I love you for reading and giving me a platform. We have so many wonders to achieve together and I'm glad that you have committed to the ride.
"Sing out, don't worry about singing well!"
Love, Light and Laughter!
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